Use it or lose it: The science behind self-confidence

Is a lack of confidence holding you back from leaving your comfort zone and achieving your dreams? Annette Densham chatted to Sue Prentice, CEO of digital agency Beyond Points, to find out the truth behind self-confidence.

Our minds are powerful tools, if you give them what they need to work with. Your thoughts can manifest in everything that happens next – whether it’s an action or a reaction.

Often, people think of confidence as something the lucky few are born with, and the rest are left wishing for.

That is not true. In fact, confidence is not a fixed attribute; it’s the outcome of the thoughts we think and the actions we take. No more; no less. It is not based on your actual ability to succeed at a task, but your belief in your ability to succeed.

Self-confidence can be built

For Sue Prentice, CEO of Beyond Points, she’s worked hard to build her belief in her ability to own a successful business. Growing a digital agency in an ocean of digital agencies is not an easy task; being able to stand out is paramount. Instead of falling back on tactics to stand out, Sue worked on herself.

“The most powerful way to build confidence is to act with the confidence you aspire to have. That is, to act as if you already possess the confidence you aspire to have,” she said.

“I have learnt how to speak up, reach out, stretch yourself, exit your comfort zone and own it.”

There are reams of research on building a robust sense of self-confidence and banishing the self-doubt that can undermine it, but it basically boils down to the decision you take as a business owner to back yourself and take a risk.

“The only way to build self-confidence is to take a risk and act on it without deliberating, because sometimes this leads us down unexpected paths towards success. If things work out, you now know you can do more than you think. If things don’t work out, you now know that you can handle more than you think. Either way, you’re better off,” Sue said.

Perfection is a trap

In a world that often seems to overly embrace perfection, Sue has found accepting imperfection is part of the process.

“I have seen far too many people stay in the same role for too long, because they have bought into the confidence-shrinking (and career-limiting) belief that they can’t do anything else or are not worthy, smart or educated enough,” said Sue.

“Someone achieves a modicum of career success, only to become unwilling to do anything that might put it at risk. So they start spending more time in their comfort zone, where there is minimal risk of failure and little threatens their confidence.”

Sue has some tips for business owners struggling with confidence.

“If you’re not growing, you’re shrinking,” she said. “If you want more customers and your business to grow, instead of playing to win, play to learn and grow.

“When we set goals to win, it drives fear into people; all they can see is they might lose the ground they already have. Their unwillingness to lay their reputation and security on the line in the short term leads to missing out bigger opportunities down the road. Opportunities that go to those who’ve never stopped stretching, growing, learning and strengthening their confidence along the way.

“Think of something you have always wanted to do, but have avoided because you fear it could be embarrassing,” advises Sue. “Now clear your mind and give it a go.”

Believe in yourself

Sue’s business success and her recent win as a finalist in the AusMumpreneur Awards has been powered by her own advice.  When Sue doubts her abilities and business journey, she channels her heroes.

“Think of someone you greatly admire who radiates a quiet sense of confidence, and think about what they would do or say if they were facing your current challenges and opportunities. Channel their self-confidence, gratitude and bravery, and you too will create your own hero story.”

Sue said you have to believe in your inner power to achieve success.

“Mindset and attitude has everything to do with success. The experience of taking that giant leap into the unknown is something I’ll always be grateful for. It’s taken me on unimaginable journeys and thrilling experiences, both good and bad, which I willingly share and which have shaped me.”

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